Welcome to another episode of the podcast that teaches you how to be a ridiculously good virtual assistant.
Today I want to talk about goal setting as it relates to your confidence level as a VA.
Today’s Quote: “Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.” – Peter T. McIntyre
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Connect with Tracey D’Aviero, VA Coach and Trainer
Episode Notes:
Last episode we talked about planning before goal setting, and that’s so important. I hope you got some good takeaways and got your own lookback process done for your VA business.
The new year brings a lot of emotions – a mix of excitement and pressure. Big promises. Big goals. Big declarations.
But confidence does not come from making bold statements. It comes from trusting yourself to follow through in a grounded, realistic way.
This episode is about setting goals that build confidence rather than erode it.
Because the wrong goals do not just fail. They chip away at your belief in yourself.
I am all about helping you build your confidence so you can do the work you want to do with the people you want to work with, and make good money doing it.
Working by yourself has its perks. Lots of them. But the one consistent thing that I notice in chatting with VAs every day is that it also can deteriorate your mindset.
You might not even notice it happening – you probably don’t.
You think that mistakes you make are yours alone. That no one else makes them. Wrong.
You think that you are meant to struggle through business. Wrong.
You think that you couldn’t possibly deserve the rewards that the goals you set for yourself bring you. Wrong again.
I think goal setting gets a bad rap because we think they have to be so huge or they don’t mean anything. That a small goal isn’t a goal, just a thing we do.
Many virtual assistants set goals that look impressive but feel overwhelming the moment real life enters the picture.
They aim for massive growth without accounting for capacity. Like bringing in new clients without a plan for time management.
They commit to consistency without acknowledging past burnout. Like trying to keep up with a networking and marketing that is just too much.
They plan as if confidence will magically appear once the goal is achieved. Like taking on tasks a client needs without really knowing how to do them, but landing that client to figure it out.
But confidence is built in the process, not the outcome.
If your goals require you to become a completely different person overnight, they are not confidence-building. They are pressure-building. And who needs more pressure these days?
There is a big difference between excitement and anticipation and pressure. When you build something that stretches you but that you know is attainable, that’s excitement.
If all you feel is pressure, sit with that for a minute and think about why that is.
A confident goal has a few characteristics.
It feels like it is stretching you, but not paralyzing you.
It asks you to show up differently, not perfectly.
It respects your current season, energy, and responsibilities.
A confident goal can still be something you have never attained before, but you recognize that, and you put the proper steps in place to reach it nonetheless.
You grow your own confidence when you keep small promises to yourself consistently. Not when you chase big goals that feel misaligned with how you actually operate.
You can’t BE someone else – you can do the things they do, but it still has to fit with your personality, your knowledge, your work ethic, your work pace, you know?
Yes, you do have to change something to reach a goal you have never reached. Sometimes that’s something big, but more often it’s just something different.
You don’t have to change your whole personality – but maybe focusing on becoming more confident feels that way to you.
I talk a lot about confidence, I know. I’m the Confidence Coach for VAs for a reason. Because confidence affects so many things in your business. And it can definitely affect them in a negative way.
If you aren’t confident in writing social media content, then you can have someone else do it for you.
If you aren’t confident in setting your rates and creating solid packages, you can get someone else to help you with that.
But if you aren’t confident in having business conversations, that’s something you need to learn to do yourself. For yourself. You can’t get clients and work with clients if you can’t talk to them.
Confidence is a good thing. A useful thing. And it’s learnable.
So, instead of asking, “What do I want to achieve this year?” a more powerful question is this: “What kind of business owner do I want to practice being this year?” (Tune in to the word practice here. That’s an important one.)
You are not trying to arrive. You can’t just change who you are. But you can change some things about how you act. You are trying to rehearse new ways of thinking, deciding, and responding.
A confident business owner practices making decisions without overthinking.
Practices charging appropriately without apologizing.
Practices being visible without waiting to feel ready.
Those practices naturally lead to results. Not necessarily the first time you do them, but with practice.
Like when you learned to ride a bike. Or cook something. Or drive a car. Or manage a client’s schedule. Or launch a social media channel. Whatever you do today, you did once for the first time. And you practiced till you got better at it.
The decisions you make are the key here. Don’t get bogged down by the feeling of large decisions, or wrong decisions. You have to make lots of choices every single day for your business to move forward.
You are capable of making decisions.
You decide when to get up, when to go to bed, what to eat, what to wear, what to watch on tv, where to put something in your home, and so on.
You can make decisions. If you have yourself convinced right now that decision making is hard, then there is something else that is keeping you stuck. What is it?
Is it that fear we talked about earlier? If so, what are you afraid of. Making a mistake? Making the wrong decision? What will really happen if you don’t charge the right amount of money for something? What will really happen if you put yourself out there in your social media? What will really happen if you reach out to that client that you want to work with?
When we sit with it and think about what will really happen – what’s the worst that could happen – we realize that the decisions are not that hard after all.
Another important shift is letting go of all-or-nothing thinking.
You do not need the perfect plan to start.
You do not need full confidence to take action.
You do not need to know how everything will work out.
Perfect is not better than done. Done is better than perfect.
Do, and move on. Everything you do in your business is a work in progress – your rates, your packages, your social media, your website, your service list. You will grow and change as time goes on. And you can change anything, anytime you want.
But you won’t go anywhere at all if you don’t take the first step.
Confidence grows when you allow yourself to do and then adjust, without thinking you failed the first attempt, or made a mistake.
Goals that leave no room for adjustment often get abandoned entirely. Goals that expect flexibility tend to evolve and stick.
So, how to set goals? Think of them in terms of what you need.
When I teach goal setting to VAs, the light bulb goes on over their head. It’s pretty cool actually.
Goals are not all just about revenue. You can set goals for number of clients to work with, services to offer, training to take, events to attend, and yes, revenue to achieve. Goals don’t need to only be financial to work for you.
Probably my most famous goal that I teach is to network with 2 people every single day.
Two conversations with business owners, every single day. Let’s do the math as to why this works.
First of all, everyone has time to talk to two people every day. You can talk to them on social media, or through email, or through events, or phone calls or Zoom calls. Whatever you want. But make them meaningful conversations – short ones work.
Two per day. That’s 40 per month – or 60 if you don’t take the weekends off.
It takes less than 15 minutes a day to reach out to two people. Sometimes it only takes 2 minutes per person! Everyone has that amount of time. Everyone.
And if you are having 40 to 60 conversations a month, what is that doing for you?
First it’s developing a great habit of doing something every single day to help your business. Second, it’s holding a daily goal. Hey! Look at that! Third, it’s helping you practice having conversations. Fourth, it’s putting you in touch with so many people a month. It doesn’t have to be 40 new people – you can follow up with people. As long as you are having 2 meaningful conversations a day, you will reach your 40 to 60.
If you are having 40 to 60 business conversations every single month, you will get clients.
If not, then that’s when you need to get help with what you are saying in these conversations.
But that volume of communication and conversations will get you clients. You won’t even have to do anything else. I promise.
Two conversations is a goal you can set right now, and start doing every day. Instant gratification. If you miss a day, pick it up the next day and keep going.
Never try to catch up on missed goals. That’s the beauty of a small daily goal – if you were to try to do all your networking on Sunday night for 2 hours, and then something comes up, you are behind 2 hours AND a week. Do it for 15 minutes every day and if you miss a day, you are still much further ahead.
Two conversations a day is doable. And it is effective.
So … goal setting doesn’t have to be overwhelming. It just needs to be defined and manageable.
As you roll through this new year, consider how your goals make you feel when you imagine working on them consistently.
Do they feel grounding or draining? Expanding or heavy? Supportive or demanding?
Your nervous system matters. Your energy matters. Your confidence depends on both.
You are your VA business. The commodity. The product. So you have to consider your nervous system, and your mindset all the time.
And it’s okay if you’re an introvert. You can still have a great VA business. You just need to find a way that works for you to communicate with clients.
A little quiet goal setting can be awesome!
They focus on showing up regularly instead of proving something.
They prioritize clarity over speed.
They allow confidence to build gradually instead of demanding instant certainty.
You have to find your own balance to make it work for you.
Let’s circle back to today’s quote: “Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.”
Smash that fear because it doesn’t dictate what you need to do. Find the help you need to push through the uncomfortable parts. Try. Adjust. Keep going.
Do You Need Help?
This is how confidence is built. One decision at a time.
This is what I help VAs like you with all the time. Figuring out what you want, how to get it, and what you need to do to start taking those steps toward it.
Goal setting comes first, then the strategy. Let’s talk about your goals! Connect with me at YourVAMentor.com/links. I’m here to help. It’s the only reason I’m here at all – to help you become a ridiculously good virtual assistant.
I appreciate you tuning in so much – every single week. I love talking to you and hearing that you love the podcast.
It’s my favourite way of connecting with you, and I would love for that to translate into a conversation for us too.
I’m here when you’re ready.
Thanks so much for tuning in this week.
If I haven’t talked to you yet, Happy New Year to you and your loved ones – I’ll see you next time!